Being Weak
by stefanobi
Summary: Lin allows herself to be weak, in a moment when she thinks everything lost It has become unbearable for Lin that she has lost her bending and her police force. After all what else did she have? This is my first story, so please criticise the hell out of it! I borrowed some concepts from JHLZ.NTL's "Lives Forgotten"... great story
1. Chapter 1

Lin could see it in his eyes, pity, in the few seconds Tenzin looked away from his family to watch if she's alright he was pitying her.

She didn't want his pity, she didn't want his presence and his familys presence, though she felt guilty at the thought.

They were on the ride to the southern watertribe, if anyone could help, it would be Katara, she is the greatest healer in the world, if she couldn't do it

nobody could, she was a last lifeline where Lin has all hopes suspended on. Maybe she could get her bending back, maybe even her police force, she could

be useful again, could still protect the city, everyone who lives therein.

It's all she had done the past 15 years, she has been protecting every streeturchin, every mother, every family and she has been protecting him.

He didn't love her anymore, she knew that, she couldn't completely believe he loved her to begin with, how else could he leave her like that after 20 years,

20 goddamn years, they were a couple since they were 16, even though their relationship ended 15 years ago she couldn't bring herself to stop loving him.

She hated him too, but she wouldn't forgive herself if something happened to him or his children or even his wife, that wretched piece of garbage who is as

interesting as a blank piece of paper. She certainly doesn't love Tenzin like Lin does, Pema doesn't love Tenzin, she loves him being Tenzin,that is, the last

Airbender, Pema is a groupie, why did Tenzin chose the most bland one he could find, it was a mystery to her.

As Lins thoughts raged on, the ship docked at the harbor of Harbor City of the Southern Watertribe. They disembarked and got onto Oogie, as Katara lived

quite a long way out of town, Korra could meet her parents later, now they got more important things to do.

'Team Avatar' didn't look very hopeful to her, they just didn't know what a goodhealer Katara was, by contrast Lin had hope,

it was all she had, Korra on the other hand looked like she was walking to the scaffold instead of a healer.

Katara awaited them at the landing site, waving until the furry beast touched the ground, she heartily greeted Tenzin and his family but stopped when she saw Korras face.

She immediately turned to Tenzin:"What has happened?"

"The equalists got Korra, she's lost her bending"

Katara's face expressed utter shock

"Let's get inside!"Katara ordered.

Lin was a bit taken aback at the revelation that Republic City's recent events didn't reach the master Waterbender, though she figured it was because of the isolated location she was living in.

Wait! Did Tenzin forget to mention me to his mother? I went on a suicide mission to save his family and lost everything I had and that is how he thanks me? I didn't even think

I would survive that, if i would have gotten the other airship, I would have jumped into a wet grave. The man I sacrificed everything for obviously doesn't care for me, not the tiniest bit, how encouraging.

Lin felt angry, sad and lonely, her whole family had left her, first Aang then Sokka and Katara, Kya, Bumi and Izumi left her after Tenzin broke up with her, seemingly to

not take sides, but she knows it's because they don't care about her, even her own flesh and blood left her, Suyin and her mother, she hated them both but she needed them and finally

the police force left her, then her city, then her bending.

They entered the house and Korra was immediately led to a wash tub they filled with lukewarm water, she submerged and Katara used her bending. The room filled with a bright blue light.

Everyone else was seated in the living room, to wait, Katara said it could take hours to even find out if it would work. Everyone sat there deflated and depressed, everyone but Lin,

she was pacing the room, anticipating a sentence if her life could return to normal or she be be broken beyond repair and completely useless.

 _She should be out by now!_

 _she should be out by now being able to bend!_

Lin's fear that no treatment would work and that she'd be of no use to anyone were downright agonizing.

To distract herself from the impending doom she looked at all pictures, hanging on the wall and on tables, she could find, Kya Bumi Tenzin, Aang embracing Tenzin after he got his tattoos, the old Gaang,

Tenzin with children and wife, a photo taken two years ago. There's only one thing Lin couldn't find and that was a depiction of herself, there even was a picture of Suyin and Kya,

but Lin wasn't to be seen in any of the pictures. She wondered if there was at least one picture somewhere it this house, someone who thought about her, she checked the kitchen,

some pictures of Aang playing with his children, in the hallway the Firelord Zuko and his wife Firelady Mai stood proudly over their little Princess Izumi, further down the hall was a picture of Toph at her inauguration as chief of police.

Most smaller rooms didn't have much pictures, most of them just some of Aang and Katara or their children, but none of her.

She finally reached the last room of the corridor, it was locked, even though she felt bad about the intrusion, she bent the lock open and peeked inside.

Pelts were hanging on the walls and lay on the ground, the stuffed head of a giant Sabretoothmooselion adorning the wall above a simple desk with writing utensils.

It was Sokka's hunting room and office, actually the whole house was initially Sokkas hunting hut, he would go out there, far away from the city to

hunt tigerseals otterpenguins and polarbeardogs. After Sokka died, Katara decided to live there, as Aang wasn't around anymore and their children were having their own familys.

Katara probably didn't want to disturb Sokka's sanctuary and left it as is.

She found one protruding square on the desk and approached to take a look at it, it was a framed picture, she lifted the frame to her eyes and could see herself in it, not just herself,

but she and Tenzin, they seemed so happy, Tenzin grabbing Lin by her waist beaming a smile so big one could wonder if his face would split, beside him Lin smiled full of love looking

to the love of her life with small tears in her eyes. Lin's gaze caught the necklace she was wearing that day, it was a picture of their betrothal, a promise never acted upon.

she would never be so happy again in her life. Would never be happy again, she sadly corrected herself.

When Tenzin told her he wanted to end their relationship the necklace was the only thing she threw at him, she broke the stone into tiny pieces and punched them into his chest,

the force wasn't strong enough to pierce his ribcage but she did draw blood and hopefully broke some ribs, the rest of her anger she directed at the island, she didn't want to hurt

him, not really, she loves him, she only wanted him to feel at least some of her pain.

Tears were already clouding her vision, but she only let them fall after another realization dawned on her: Sokka cared, Sokka died four years after Tenzin ended their relationship and he

visited his hut often, he cared about her and he's dead, she knows Aang cared too, she's glad he didn't have to see their breakup, they're all dead, everyone who cared about her.

She hadn't seen her mother for years but Lin is sure, she would just be dissapointed of her being weak.

"Let me be weak mother just once" she thought out loud

Lin took paper and ink and began to write.


	2. Chapter 2

**Dear Tenzin**

he flipped the paper over

 **I know you don't care about me anymore, nobody does, but I need to get some things off my chest.**

 **I am alone now, truly alone, everyone left me, even my bending.I want to tell you I am sorry. I am sorry that I couldn't keep our relationship going,**

 **I am sorry that I couldn't protect you enough, I am sorry that my mother defined my life,**

 **I am sorry I didn't want to bear you any children, I am sorry I didn't tell you everything.**

 **I haven't told you that I had a miscarriage, I was too afraid to tell you, I didn't want that to happen again, ever.**

 **I haven't told you that after we broke up I cried myself to sleep every night for three years straight because you weren't with me,**

 **that everytime I enter my flat my heart still hurts because no one is in there.**

 **Everytime I see you and your children I think of what could have been but will never be and I see how happy you are without me,**

 **I don't like to think of it that way, though it's true: That you are happy because you are without me.**

 **I for my part am not happy without you, I will never be, I'm miserable, the only thing i had was my job,**

 **protecting the city, but mainly you and your family, it was my way to express my love, it calmed me to know you are safe because of me, but that is gone for good.**

 **I am sorry that I'm angry, I'm angry at you for letting me go, angry at the world because it brought me in this situation,**

 **but more than anything I'm angry at myself, because I'm a coward, because I hate you, because I love you,**

 **because I didn't see you never loved me, even after 20 years this took me by surprise**

 **and because I didn't realize I never deserved you.**

 **I deserve nobody and nobody loves me, nobody likes me, nobody even cares.**

 **Mom would hate me if she knew I lost my bending, Su already hates me.**

 **Katara hates me too apparently, she didn't say a single word to me since we came here and we haven't met for nine years, didn't even greet me.**

 **Every word spoken to me since I lost my bending was out of courtesy, from your children, from you, from Pema, even the Avatar and her companions, I feel like a used tissue paper**

 **that is discarded after it isn't useful anymore.**

 **The only people I can think of that really loved me are dead, Aang is dead and Sokka is dead.**

 **I hate to say it but keeping you safe, keeping your family safe, was the sole purpose of my miserable existence.**

 **I know you are a very gentle and sweet man, if you don't care about me, why should I expect anyone else to.**

 **I'm sorry that our relationship wasn't worth continuing, it probably was nothing but a nuisance to you.**

 **I'm sorry I was too much of a coward to talk about our problems.**

 **I love you**

 **I want it to end**

 **Lin**

He dried away his tears, he couldn't believe what he just read, though it was unmistakably Lin's handwriting.

Does she really believe that he didn't love her, that he doesn't love her, or that the most joyful years he ever spent were a nuisance to him.

Until this moment Tenzin had not realized how much he hurt Lin with the breakup, she apparently thought she was responsible for everything that led to their breakup,

that she isn't worth being loved.

He also couldn't believe she thought he was happy without her, he hasn't been truly happy for 15 long years, Pema is, even though very lovely, not very interesting to be around,

he wasn't laughing with her, wasn't joking, they didn't discuss books they read, like Lin and he used to, all he and Pema have in common are their children, they are funny and

he loves them, but it's not the same.

This was also the first time Tenzin heard of a miscarriage, his gut wrenched at the thought of it.

Maybe if we could have talked about it, I could have convinced her to try again.

Tears welled again in his eyes, as this was the sole reason he broke up with her. After Aang died members of the white lotus came to him pleading to search for a wife that would bear

him children, at least they were pleading at first, they started to claim he wanted his fathers legacy to die, that he was unworthy, selfish and greedy, that he didn't care about

anyone but himself. At first they came every month then every second week, finally they came every day accusing him, insulting him even threatening him and Lin, he didn't tell her,

he didn't want her to worry about it, though in the end he couldn't bear it anymore, to him it sounded like they would rather kill Lin than stand him being together with her.

It was shocking for Tenzin that she thought nobody cares for her, everyone cares for her, though most are reluctant to show it since Pema usually hangs on him like a leech and

nobody want's her to feel out of place as she doesn't have the same friends the same family as he and Lin have.

And because Tenzin himself asked his family to ignore her while he was around, it was not one of his proudest requests, but he couldn't bear it, every memory, every picture, real or just in thought needed to be removed

or else Tenzin wouldn't have been able to live his farce of a lovely marriage.

Lin on the other hand kept social contact on a minimum since they went their separate ways, she drowned herself in work and she had more contact with her friends in the last month than all 15 years before

that, with the exception of Sokka's funeral. Nearly everytime she was with her friends, her family, Pema was present as was Tenzin.

He read the letter again and stopped right at the end

'I want it to end'

What does she mean by that?

Does she want to dissappear like her mother or Sister?

Tenzin decided whatever it is, he should convince her otherwise,

he went to the living room asking if anyone had seen her.

"Oh Chief Beifong, she came in when Korra left the house and went to the hallway where you came from, then she went out again." Bolin told him casually

"Where did she go? Did she say anything?"

"No, she just left" He was no useful source of information.

Tenzin took his staff and was storming outside looking for tracks, it was easy to see where Korra went, she has feet that could rival Avatar Kyoshi's, Lin's were trickier to spot.

A bit away from the trampled down snow in front of the house, he could perceive tracks made by a slender pair of feet, he decided to follow them taking large steps

as to reach her before she gets on a boat or airship, about an hour he walked without ever seeing anything from her, except her tracks.

He still went on, her tracks were fresh, it was snowing lightly but her tracks were not filled or blown away, she couldn't be more than twenty minutes ahead.

He finally reached a ledge the glacier formed, it was about thirty metres high, the tracks went up it's back, he followed.

Nothing, there was absolutely nothing, the tracks ended and he could see nothing but that, there was no airship in the distance or skybison for that matter, no satomobile, no animal

no sound, just silence. He placed his feet in the last pair of tracks he could see pointing towards the abyss, he screamed an angry and hurt yell wich filled the air.

Just as he looked down in defeat something caught his eye, a heap of black and grey lay on the foot of the abyss he was standing on.

The blood in his veins froze, without a second thought he leapt after, only remembering at the very last moment to slow his fall with airbending.

He bent over her, she lay in an awkward position, on her back with one foot beneath her and the other one sticking out, her lower leg bending at an odd angle in the middle.

"Lin! Lin! It's me Tenzin!" He took her head between both hands

"Please wake up! Please!" rocking her head, he started to sob,

he continued to plead with her while bringing his forehead to hers

"I love you Lin please don't leave me I need you"

She didn't budge, but Tenzin could feel her heart beating, realizing he needed to be fast, he swooped her off the ground trying not to damage her legs any further,

lifted her on his back with both her arms over his shoulders, then he bound her hands with a piece of cloth he tore from his robes and used a longer cloth to fix her at his waist.

He flew away with his glider, Lin on his back, the takeoff wasn't really gracefull as was the flight but it did suffice, though it used much of his strengh and concentration.

He landed a few feet away from the house, removed the binds on Lin's hands and waist and took her in his arms bridal style, she looked beautiful, her hair flowing down over his shoulder and arm,

the sun that shone through the clouds reflected upon her alabaster skin and her face was in a very serene expression, Tenzin on the other hand, had most certainly never looked worse

he was sobbing unconrollably, he looked at least twenty years older, his lips quivering and tears running down his face at an alarming rate.

He took heavy steps, trying with all his might not to lose his grip on Lin's unconscious body, he entered the house past the antechamber into the livingroom, no one was there, so

he continued to the kitchen.

When Katara heard his sons steps she stopped stirring the five-flavor soup she was preparing, but only when she heard his sobs she turned around to see what was wrong.

Katara hadn't heard her Son cry since her brother died, it couldn't mean something good.

She couldn't believe her eyes, Lin lay in her sons arms apparently unconscious, with a quite obviously broken leg, her limbs hanging limp from her shoulders and knees.

It was shocking to see her like that, Lin is like a second daughter to Katara, she could never understand how her son could let such a nice person go choosing Pema in her stead.

After the first few seconds of shock Katara was suddenly as fit as her twenty year old self.

"Get her in the bathtub! fast!"


	3. Chapter 3

Through the black veil clouding her thoughts, a yellow light shone through her eyelids.

 _What does this mean? Have I finally frozen to death?_

Her thoughts became more panicked

 _Am I burning?_

It certainly felt like it, her skin felt like it was burning off, to finally reveal pink flesh and red blood.

Her eyes were still clenched shut, she didn't want to open them, imagining the sight would torture her more than the burning pain ever could.

Why was she tortured even in death? Lin didn't know, though she believed it certainly was for something she did in life.

 _I deserve this! Now everyone will think they mistreated me and a funeral is such a chore, even if it's just for appearance, I doubt someone will cry over my passing._

 _It must be a real nuisance to drag a dead body around the ice, and they also need to find me first, why didn't I think about that, now I made them even more work and I_

 _thought I would be one less sick to heal and one less mouth to feed._

She decided she should open her eyelids, she deserved whatever agony awaitet her, and waiting could very well make it worse.

Her eyes opened slowly the yellow light now invading her eyesight unhindered, blurring her vision.

"Lin? Haha Lin!" a happy voice proclaimed

was it mocking her? Laughing at her misery? Oh, it must be extremely enjoyable to watch someone getting tortured in their afterlife.

Something dark blocked the light now from entering her eyes, she could slowly start to see.

Tenzin expected quite a few things that could happen, but no scenario prepared him for reality.

As soon as Lin could recognize him her mouth was gaping in shock, but before Tenzin could say anything, explain to her that he safed her, loved her and always will love her,

she regained control over her right arm and punched him in the nose, it broke upon contact with the reddened pair of knuckles.

Tenzin shortly cried out in pain.

"Why do you do this! Why are you tormenting me even further!" Lin screamed with all the force she could bring up, though her lungs, burning, couldn't hold that much air.

"It's me Lin, Tenzin, don't you recognize me?"

"How could I ever forget that stupid face of yours!"

"Lin, listen, what you wrote in th.." An angry Lin interrupted

"No, you listen! I allow myself to be weak one time, only once and you just render it void forcing me to live in this hell!" She was taking shallow breaths every other word.

Tenzin let the words sink in for a moment, when he recovered he decided to do something extremely stupid. He covered her lips with his.

Lin was completely frozen, not moving a single muscle, after he broke the kiss she couldn't say a word she just stared wide eyed

"I love you Lin, I always loved you! I need you!"

At the sound of the words Lin first began to cry, then to sob and finally wimper

"I love you Lin" Tenzin said again and tried to wrap his arms around her, but Lin pushed him away forcefully as he tried to get closer.

 _Does he really think I'm that stupid?_

Lin became angry again "You only say that because you think I would try again if you didn't. Now go out! Go to your wife! I don't want so see you again!"

"Lin I wont't leave, I love you, please forgive me!"

"Stop lying to me!"

"I'm not lying Lin" He sounded a little sad, was he telling the truth?

 _No it can't be, he just wants to be nice, so I won't bother him with a funeral._

"Stop being polite Tenzin. ...will you go to your family and leave me alone if I swear not to kill myself?" Lin asked defeated

"I won't leave you Lin... not again"

"please!" Lin started to cry again.

Tenzin took her into his strong arms, this time without being shoved away.

She cried into his shoulder until sleep took her.

Lin was fast asleep and Tenzin decided he would bring her belongings, since, as Katara told him, she would need to stay in bed for at least three more days.

He slipped out of her arms, careful not to wake her, and headed to her room. She hadn't prepared anything there, the backpack with all her belongings minus the police uniform,

she was now unable to wear, lay haphazardly on the floor in the corner of the room.

It was one of seven guestrooms Sokka built in the house shortly after his hunting lodge was finished, the building housed two stories with five rooms each, the actual hunting lodge was connected to the main house by the hallway on the ground floor.

Tenzin searched through her bag, she was not going to use everything while lying in bed, Lin apparently only possessed police uniforms he placed two wintercoats in her closet as well as a pair of heavy and thick trousers, she didn't wear any winterclothes when she went outside earlier this week, either because she didn't bother or because she wanted to freeze.

As he relived the memory of finding her on the ice of the southpole in his mind, he touched a hard piece of paper or carton, it was hastily stuffed inside the main pocket of the bag.

He retrieved the scrunched up piece, discovering it was a photograph, he turned it over and smoothed out the picture.

He could clearly see his and Lin's engagement, remembering the occasion like it was yesterday, on the picture he appeared to be the happiest man alive, that's because he was.

Never had Tenzin be any happier in his life, not at the moment of his wedding to Pema, where he was clearly out of his mind, concerned for Lin and uncomfortable with the publicity of the occasion, not at the birth of Jinora, where he prayed to all the spirits, that she would be healthy and Pema would not suffer harm from the birthing, nothing came near that moment when he made a pact with the person he loved to stay together until they died.

He didn't, he didn't act out the promise he made, the undying spirit of the Avatar stood witness and he didn't do it.

Aang encouraged Tenzin to marry her, he helped with the betrothal necklace, a beautiful peace made out of malachite adorned with the angular symbol of earth made out of gold and in its center the three swirls of air in silver, the whole thing was covered in a turmaline, clear as glass with a hint of green, Avatar Aang bent around to protect the precious core his son carved.

Tenzin was told by his father, that he should marry whomever he loves, if Katara didn't get any airbender children, Aang still would have never bedded another woman,

"The world naturally strives for balance, humankind did not start with bending, it was learned from the original benders and the reappearance of the skybison gave hope to the world, that there might be airbenders again", his father told him all those years ago.

If he would have just listened to his father.

Tenzin realized that Aang probably had several discussions with the White Lotus, they came very often to Air-Temple Island after Tenzin was twenty, no one of the old members, that were good friends of Aang and his family, were alive for at least eight years at that point, the last one was master Piandao, he reached the ripe old age of 82 before dying in his sleep.

The realization dawned upon him, that the right thing wouldn't have been to let Lin go, if Avatar Aang would have been alive, he would have objected, he did object, Tenzins father knew what was the right thing and never let the white lotus say anything against it, but when he died his objection died with him.

Tenzin forced himself awake, he was staring at the picture in his hands lost in thought for at least ten minutes.

Lin looked beautiful, this Lin he was proposing to was full of live, joking and laughing, it was a stark contrast to the Lin he worked with the last fifteen years, a cold calculating person not trusting anyone and serious in every matter, or the Lin who lay in a bed a few rooms up the hallway, broken and angry like a hurt animal. The most different person to all of them was the Lin that wrote that letter to him, a person believing everything was her fault, acknowledging her mistakes, but also weeping over what they had lost.

He wished for the person he was engaged with to come back, or that at least the serious Lin didn't come back. They never talked for fifteen years, he had never heard anything that was not business related from her, he didn't want to know every move of the triads, he was interested in her, what Lin did the day, if she was well or if she found another one, anything to alleviate the silence between them.

It hurt him, he should have moved on, he was married after all, but the thought of not knowing anything about the person he spent his entire life with wasn't very pleasurable at all.

He knew every nook and crannie of her, every tiny quirk of her personality, she was an open book to him as he was to her. Suddenly they knew nothing of the other, Lin even went so far as to proclaim, in her letter,

that she didn't know if Tenzin had ever loved her, this notion made him feel guilty.

 _I should have told Lin, that I wasn't leaving her because I didn't love her!_

Tenzin took the bag, loaded with spare clothes in his right, and the picture in his left and went off to the room next to the washing chamber and the kitchen where Lin recovered.

She was still sleeping, so he leaned the bag beside her bed, placed the picture on her nightstand, took a short look at her angel like appearance and headed off to find Katara.

His Nose was still broken and needed mending, he should have gone to his mother immediately, but comforting Lin was a more important task.

The bleeding had stopped even before Lin was asleep, that should have been about an hour ago, but it was still throbbing and it hurt, a small gust of wind would be enough to bring him intense pain.

Tenzin found Katara in the kitchen stirring in a large pot, a pleasant smell filling the air. carrots? maybe some parsnip? there was some aroma Tenzin couldn't quite assign, but it smelled delicious.

"That's not five-flavour soup is it?"

"It's arctic-hen soup, Grangran used to make it back at home"

"ewww!" He pinched his nose in an exaggerated manner

"I don't eat that mom"

"It's not for you dear, it's for the guest that has been living here for a week. Reminds me. How is Lin, have you checked on her?" His mother asked still turned towards the soup, stirring.

"That is actually the reason I had come here"

"Do you want to go back to your family? I won't mind, Lin has always been like a second daughter to me. I'll manage. I'm actually surprised you are still here while Pema took the children back to Airtemple Island"

"No, I don't want to go. Lin woke up!"

"She did?" Katara's look of surprise deepened after she turned around, now clearly able to see Tenzins mangled face.

"Well... she's asleep again. Could you please help me with this?" he asked pointing at his nose

"No problem" she stated unenthusiastically, Katara was used to patch others up, it could never peak her interest as much as the fighting had, but she got a lot of practice especially with Sokka and Bumi.

Katara bent a sphere of boiling water out of a cauldron beside the soup and mixed it with cold water from a water tank situated in her kitchen.

Republic city already had an aqueduct system, the waterbenders

would get the water from surrounding rivers, clean it with the help of earthbenders and collect it in a giant reservoir above the city, it would then flow down to the city, giving clean water to every household.

Republic City's water system was invented by Tenzin's father Avatar Aang, he once came back from a visit to Omashu telling Tenzin to think outside of his box, then he snorted while laughing, back then he could just make out that his father was impersonating someone, as it turned out Aang just wanted to recreate the Omashu postal system with water. Though he claimed that all the fun would be gone, he was eventually convinced to use tubing.

Katara didn't have those luxuries, this was obviously no problem to her as a waterbender, but things like electricity couldn't be used in her home.

The water swirled around his nose, it compressed around it.

Then the swirl was moved a bit farther to the left.

 **Crack!**

"Aaaaah! Mom it hurts!"

"Do you want a straight or a crooked nose? I know what I'm doing my dear, I've fixed Bumi's nose at least five times." The mother of three didn't budge at Tenzin's outcry of pain.

After everything was where it should be, the water started to glow in a light blue.

When the deed was done Tenzin touched his nose trying to feel if everything was alright.

Katara let the water turn to ice with a mirror surface and turned it so Tenzin could see himself.

"Is everything to your liking?"

"Thank you mother, it was a pleasure." Katara grinned at this.

"no problem TenTen"

Tenzin frowned at his old nickname but would not object.

A short silence ensued until Tenzin finally spoke up.

"I brought Lin's stuff to her, could you please tell me when the soup is ready?"

"it should be in about an hour"

"I'm going then mother"

The old master enveloped her son in a hug, she seemed almost grateful.

Tenzin was a bit confused why his mother hugged him, he was just going into the next room.

He headed for the room Lin was situated in, it was actually a large washroom Katara equipped with two washtubs three beds and several water containers hanging off the walls.

Several oil lamps illuminated the room with their yellow light, the lamps were imported from the Firenation, no one was better at the art of making glass, lenses and mirrors and they knew how to design it, so the lamps

would not need much oil.

Tenzin peered across the room, past a washtub to a small storage container and finally to Lin's bed, she was sleeping deeply, her, once ebony, now greyed hair flowed freely down her shoulders and breast. She wore one of her black under tunics, as well as everything else she usually wore, this was part of her uniform, as was everything Tenzin saw her in for more than a decade.

The last time he could remember seeing her in "normal" clothes was at Sokka's funeral

It didn't feel right, that he hadn't even seen her as a private person, his best friend with whom he shared thirty-six of his now fifty-one year long life.

Her skin, usually white as ivory had a red tinge to it, still irritated from the cold, Katara therefore healed her every time she washed the unconscious woman, but with no obvious point of injury to travel, the chi wasn't able to mend her skin effectively.

The first two days Tenzin felt nothing but guilt.

 _It was I who drove her to this, like I myself pushing her off the cliff._

Tenzin could never imagine himself doing any harm to Lin, when he left her, he didn't realize how much it hurt Lin, but he now came to the conclusion, that by doing this, he tore everything Lin had out of her life, her family, her friends, himself, all joy, all lightheartedness, what remained was little more than a dead husk, the chief of republic city.

After the first days passed a feeling of wanting to be with her resurfaced, he brushed her hair, sang soothing words in her ear, he even sometimes cuddled to her when Katara was asleep.

Though he desired a comatose woman, it was good to be with her again, to see her breathe, feel her skin and smell her hair, he didn't knew how he missed her very being until now.

Tenzin grabbed the bag leaning on her bed and took the first of many books out of it, Lin always read, when she wasn't working, she did this back in their blissful time together and apparently now too.

Before Tenzin went to sit on the chair beside Lin he lowered his head to her ear and calmly spoke words of love to her, he then lightly kissed the temple of the sleeping woman, smiling at her he sat down and began to read.


End file.
